Before you laugh, think about it. This city has spent millions on public art installations that range from forgettable to actively confusing. Meanwhile, two characters who basically defined a tough, competent, law-and-order vision of San Francisco for an entire generation of TV viewers have zero physical presence in the city they made famous. That feels like a missed opportunity.
The show ran from 1972 to 1977, and it portrayed something almost unrecognizable today: a San Francisco where cops actually chased down criminals and the justice system functioned. Nostalgia? Sure. But also a reminder that this city once had an identity built around grit, not just tech campuses and $9 toast.
Now, there's a practical concern here, and it's one that says everything about our current moment. Karl Malden passed away in 2009 with a spotless reputation — he's probably safe. But Michael Douglas is 81 and still alive, which in today's climate means there's a nonzero chance some revelation surfaces and the city has to go through yet another agonizing statue debate. We've seen this movie before (see: César Chávez, whose name adorns a major SF street despite a complicated legacy that keeps getting more complicated).
This is the absurd calculus we've created for ourselves. We can't even honor fictional characters without running a background check on the actors who played them. The bureaucratic risk-aversion alone would probably kill this proposal in committee before anyone even discussed the design.
But here's the thing — San Francisco desperately needs symbols that connect it to its own history, especially a history that valued public safety and civic pride. A Stone-and-Keller statue on a North Beach corner or down by the Embarcadero would cost a fraction of the city's typical public art budget and would actually mean something to people.
Sometimes the best use of taxpayer dollars is the simplest one. Two bronze detectives. One great city. No committees required.
Well, okay — probably seven committees. This is still San Francisco.