If you've been stuck in traffic near 6th and Folsom lately, you may have noticed something unusual: an autonomous vehicle having what can only be described as an existential crisis.

A Waymo robotaxi reportedly encountered construction at the intersection — two lanes closed, cones everywhere, the usual SoMa chaos — and apparently hadn't gotten the memo. The result? A self-driving car frozen in indecision, creating a traffic jam the old-fashioned way: by just sitting there. As one local put it, it must have been "embarrassing for the passengers inside" who "can't get out while car is running" and found themselves stuck on 6th Street with no steering wheel to grab.

But wait, it gets better. In a separate incident, a Waymo was caught on video cutting off two other Waymos. That's right — the robots are now beefing with each other. One SF resident channeled the energy perfectly: "Maybe I picked the wrong lane to be in? No! It's the other drivers who are all wrong!"

Look, we're not anti-technology at The Dissent. Autonomous vehicles have real promise for safety and mobility. The data generally shows Waymos are involved in fewer serious collisions than human drivers. That matters.

But here's the thing: San Francisco is essentially a free beta-testing ground for a multi-billion-dollar Alphabet subsidiary, and the city is collecting almost nothing for the privilege. Our streets are the lab. Our intersections are the experiment. And when a robot car gridlocks SoMa because nobody uploaded the latest construction map, it's regular San Franciscans — drivers, Muni riders, cyclists, pedestrians — who pay the price in lost time and blocked roads.

The question isn't whether autonomous vehicles should exist. It's whether the city is doing any meaningful oversight or extracting any public benefit from being Waymo's proving ground. Right now, San Francisco seems content to let a tech giant iterate on public infrastructure while City Hall collects… vibes.

We deserve better terms than that. If SF is going to be the world's autonomous vehicle laboratory, the least we can ask for is that the lab rats get compensated.